You’re doing everything you’re supposed to be doing right?
But somehow it just doesn’t feel right.
You’re moving along on the path that you think you should follow. After all you’re not alone. Your friends are doing the same thing and your family has done it.
This is the way to success. It’s what you’re supposed to be doing. But somehow, despite what you’ve been told, it really doesn’t feel like success or anything close to it.
This is exactly how I felt after college. I was doing everything I thought I should be doing. But I felt disconnected, even when people cheered me on with approval. It was all because I was living their way.
If you continue down this path, once you finally get to where you think you want to be, you’ll realize that you made a huge mistake somewhere and feel incredibly frustrated.
But now you still have time to reroute.
It’s easy to constantly wonder why you’re unhappy when you’re seemingly doing the right thing. It seems correct because everyone else is doing it.
Besides, it’s what you been told, what you’ve been taught.
But just it’s because it’s the right thing for the masses doesn’t mean it’s the right thing for you. Everyone is different, especially when it comes to things that speak to the very heart of you.
You adapted this belief that the same carbon copy definition of success applies to everyone, but it doesn’t.
Everyone doesn’t have to live their lives the same way or even along the same lines to be successful and happy.
Instead of trying to live according to the generic idea of success you need to make it your own. You need to redefine success according to your terms.
You have to find out what you want and what makes you happy. This is the only way you’re going to live your dreams and feel truly fulfilled at the end of each day.
What You’re Going to Do
1. Determine where you want to succeed
It’s perfectly ok if you want to achieve success in different areas of your life. It’s even ok, if your main focus isn’t succeeding in your career.
Determining where you want to succeed is about where you, not others, want to see the most growth and flourish.
Identify what parts of your life mean the most to you and are tied into your happiness. Chances are those are the areas that need your focus. Then set goals to create your picture of success.
2. Know your goals in life
Once you know your key areas for success, your goals should be simpler to figure out. Just tease out the details that would make each area a success in your eyes.
As you sort them out it might be helpful to write your goals down.
Remember to set realistic expectations. The greatest achievements take time, so don’t get discouraged.
3. Identify your idea of professional success
Everyone’s idea of success at work is different.
I remember hearing, for the first time, someone tell me that they weren’t interested in getting promoted or moving up in general. At first I was taken aback, since typically most people want to move up as far as they can.
But I also intrigued by their comfort with it. It seemed as though they already knew how successful they wanted to be, and it was in their current position.
If you want to take over the company one day, good for you, start working on that. If you’re not interested in running your department one day and would much rather have solid personal relationships that’s great too.
Just make sure your idea of professional success is all yours, and most importantly, that you would be happy with it.
4. Figure out where you want to be in 5 years
This will help you get started on what you’ve uncovered so far. It also helps you determine what to expect in the coming years.
Knowing what you want for yourself for the future and actively working on making it happen will prevent you from experiencing disappointment when things don’t magically come together as you thought they would from just wishing it.
5. Balance it out
Balancing different areas of your life is an essential skill. You’ll often feel frustrated or stagnant when you put too much focus on one area and little on another, once you realize the lack in the latter.
Figure out a schedule or routine that allows you to enjoy your life while working on your goals.
You have to work out the right balance between it all so you can feel fulfilled and accomplished at the same time.
Forget About Them
Shed the beliefs of the community. When it comes to your happiness you’re the only one who has the answer.
Establishing your vision of a successful life and living it will guarantee your happiness to years to come. Even the journey, no matter how cumbersome, will be well worth it in the end.
Remember success will not be pleasant if it’s not in alignment with you. And isn’t being happy an important part of life? You know it is!
What are your terms? What embodies a successful and happy life to you?