It’s terrifying isn’t it?
But it’s a different kind of fear. It’s not the super intense, in your face kind of fear you have when you’re afraid of heights, or dogs and five of them are running towards you.
No, this is a subtle fear.
Silent, yet deadly.
From time to time you’ll experience the strong emotion but it won’t last too long, but it’s still powerful enough to stop you.
It’s like electric shock therapy, just a zap is more than enough to stop you in your tracks.
You know you want to move forward. I mean you’ve wasted enough time already, but you keep getting zapped.
It’s gotten so bad, the fear is so strong, that you don’t even try anymore.
Just the thought of it scares you and knowing that the fear will get stronger if you continue makes you rethink your sanity.
So what do you do now, risk full blown electrocution or just give up on your dreams?
You're Wearing a Mental Shock Collar
How else would you describe the torment you’re putting yourself through…?
You know you’ve seen it before, the dog the just sits in the middle of the yard in this odd yet calm manner.
He sees something he wants, but just sits there staring at it, you know he wants to get up and take off running but he doesn’t move an inch.
He gets all worked up, whimpers and lays down.
That’s you, all day.
You want to go after your goals but you know, just like that dog, that there is an invisible force between you and it that will hit you first.
For the dog it’s a shock from his collar if he tries to walk outside of the yard, his preset boundary. But for you it’s fear.
You’re letting fear stand in your way.
What you both have in common is you’re scared stiff.
You can’t just stand there like a mannequin for the rest of your life. I mean, of course you can but what kind of life would that be?
Fear is just something you can’t get around. There’s no way to avoid it, it’s just always going to be there. You’re just going to have to face it.
The best way to do that is to go through it.
Head straight for the center and shatter it to pieces. It’s the only way to get to the other side.
Doing this can be scarier but if you do it the right way you can build yourself up along the way.
1. Switch it up
You’re thinking about this all wrong.
Growing up you were taught that if you feared something that you should stay as far away from it as possible.
That when you see it coming, you need to get up and take off in the opposite direction, immediately. But that’s wrong.
If your fear is real, it’s a sign… and not one telling you to run for the hills.
It’s telling you that you’re about to break out of your comfort zone. Either you’re going into something unfamiliar or something amazing is about to happen.
Either way it’s the growth and the change you need.
And probably what you’ve been dying for all along.
So change the way you think about fear so something different can happen, for once.
2. Take it back to Math class
They may not taunt you every day but you have more than one fear, you know that.
Think of, better yet, make a list of all the things that scare the crap out of you.
Make sure you include all the little fears that stop you from taking action just when you’re about to.
Once you’ve done that look them over. What do they have in common?
Are most of them connected to one thing that you’re trying to do?
Chances are there is a pattern in your fears. It could be a fear of change, embarrassment, success, whatever, but that’s the lowest common denominator, the core of it.
This is what you need to address and turn the tables on it. Otherwise your mind will just keep coming up with excuses by way of new crippling fears.
3. Get your game face on
It’s time to put your big kid pants on.
You know the best way to get over fear is right? To look it straight in the face and call its bluff.
But in order to really pull this off without peeing your pants, and building further on that fear is to face it strategically.
Don’t just randomly pick a fear and run towards it screaming like some kind of crazed Trojan warrior with a spear. You’ve got to do it right.
Take the list of fears you made before and re-organized the list from least scary to most terrifying.
Obviously you’re going to want to start with the least scary fear and confront it.
As you continue down your scream worthy to-do list, every defeated fear will give you the guts to attack the next one.
Keep going until your list doesn’t exist anymore.
When it’s all said and done, not only will you be fearless but you’ll have the confidence to take on anything.
4. Just chill
Having strong fear about something can make you so stressed and anxious that your bowels suddenly start to move.
Sorry I had to take it there, but you know what I’m talking about.
It’s like when you were a teenager and you had your first job interview. You didn’t know what to expect, you just wanted to do well and get a job offer.
Then when the day came, as you got ready to head out the door, the more you thought about it the more anxious you got. Then suddenly the John was calling your name.
Now that lovely walk down memory lane was to remind you that your feelings are going to get out of control, and even impact different parts of you, but instead of letting it take over you should chill out.
Take deep breaths and focus on what you’re trying to accomplish.
5. Pull the brakes
When it comes down to it, you make your own fuel. The direction you end up going in comes from you.
So when you’re about to take action and fear creeps in and stops you. It’s not actually the fear that’s hitting the breaks, it’s you.
You’re in control of it all.
There have been times when challenges came up when you were trying to do something else and you continued on anyway. You didn’t let that stop you.
You can apply that same principle here.
Look at it this way, fear is just a feeling, it’s just happens to be associated with bad things. But the same way a bad feeling can come up and change things, you can stir up good feelings to do the exact opposite.
6. Think twice
Your initial instincts about fear are wrong. So don’t act on them.
Fear will make you want to drop the mic and disappear into the darkness, but don’t let it.
You’re going to start to sweat and feel uber-uncomfortable, but I promise it will pass.
Continue doing what you planned and these sensations will go away. Your shirt will dry and you might even immediately feel exhilarated.
As long as you can push through the initial weird feelings you will feel amazing when it’s all said and done.
You might even wonder why you waited so long, and what you were afraid of in the first place.
Trust me and your future self, it’s not that bad.
7. Swear by it
I mean, don’t you think it’s about time.
Up to this point you’ve basically let this fear run your life. It’s dictated what you can and can’t do.
Aren’t you tired of it running your life? Aren’t you tired of not being in control?
There are things that you’ve been dying to do but won’t touch with a ten-foot pole because of fear. And that really needs to stop.
Think about all that you’re missing out on life, all because you’re a scaredy cat.
In order for this to work you have to commit to the idea, completely.
Raise you right hand and say, “I solemnly swear not to let fear control my life anymore and limit my happiness. I will use one or all of these ways whenever fear resurfaces and I will keep moving forward.”
Break the Boundaries You've Imposed
Fear is an emotion but it doesn’t have to be a bad one.
You’ve been responding to it that way your whole life and it’s done nothing but hold you back.
Life isn’t about staying in the same place forever, it’s about progress and growth. But the only way you can reach new heights is to let go of what is holding you back.
It’s time to break the boundaries and travel into a new frontier.
Change your attitude about fear and you’ll finally be able to use it to your advantage.
Overcoming this obstacle and using it as motivation will help you to get moving in life, shattering any stagnation.
Honestly, nothing will be more helpful than that.
What do you do when fear creeps up?