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7 Vicious Beliefs You Need to Abandon to Get on the Road to Success

road to success

Yup, the most powerful tool you have to use to becoming successful could be the very thing that is holding you back.

The way you think, your common understanding around certain things is preventing you for making the breakthrough you so desperately desire. With every single attempt you’re sabotaging your efforts.

It’s like every time you come up with a solution to one problem, at the same time, you unknowingly create another obstacle that prevents you from fixing it.

Whenever you think you’re on the brink of climbing out of the rut, something grabs you, pulling you right back in.

You may not even know what it is. It just feels like the forces are working against you, leading you to believe that it’s just impossible.

But that’s not true.

It is difficult to achieve success when your most basic beliefs state otherwise.

Where did it come from?

Your beliefs are typically based on what you were taught or what you’ve observed.

But just because something didn’t work out for someone else doesn’t mean that you’ll meet the same exact fate.

And just because someone else thinks something is true doesn’t mean that it is. So you have to be careful about what others say and you choose to believe. After all, it could be a complete misunderstanding.

Certain negative beliefs around success could seem like factual words of caution but often they’re not. They are most likely just another person’s fears.

Either way, they are doing you more harm than good.

You’re not helping

You can’t live your life based on someone else’s fears. But you have, and look where it’s gotten you.

You’re scared. You’ve fallen for the negative hype from other scaredy-cats.

They’ve convinced you that their fears make perfect sense and will always hold true, even though there are other people have proved them wrong. Yet you’re still hypnotized by their frightening words.

I mean it has to be true right, because they believe it so much? Because it’s the very reason they are where they are today.

Why it’s so important

You are the result of your thoughts, just like they are of theirs. They are in the place they’re in because they don’t believe they can get out of it.

They’re stuck because of the very beliefs they have convinced you to believe. So unless you want to be a carbon copy of them you need to change your way of thinking.

Since you’ve inherently adopted this way of thinking you have to dispute it to shatter the hold it has on your psyche. It shouldn’t be too difficult since as I said, others have contradicted these beliefs but it will take consistency and time.

You have to do it because these vicious beliefs are not helping you. They’re only hindering you from reaching your potential and your goals. And if it’s not helping you get to where you want to be you should probably chuck it anyway, don’t you think?

Once your mental roadblocks vanish it’ll be like you’ve opened up an entirely new lane on the road to success. It will be so much easier to move forward and come up with solutions.

7 beliefs that are keeping you off of the road to success

1. You need someone else’s approval

When you’re trying to do something new and different other people around you may not understand it. They may even say harsh things that can discourage you.

Keep in mind why you want to do it and that you can, even without their seal of approval. It’s really about what you think that matters most.

Not everyone will get it and that’s fine. They just need to respect your decision to do it.

All you should seek is their support. And even without that you’ll be fine.

2. Failure is the end

Just because one thing didn’t work out doesn’t mean that nothing will.

Achieving something new is a learning process. You’re entering a whole new realm so it’s not always going to be smooth sailing. You’ll have to try some things out and switch some other things up.

If one way doesn’t work it doesn’t mean it can’t happen, it just means there’s another way.

3. I can’t do anything

Maybe you’ve tried a few different things but it just didn’t pan out for you. Ok, you weren’t the best at it but that doesn’t make you a complete failure.

Maybe it just wasn’t your thing.

Find out your passion and do something around it. When your heart is in it you have a greater chance of being successful.

Figure out what interests you, what gets you excited or riled up. What could you do all day if you had the chance? That’s what you can excel at because you’re already into it.

4. It’s impossible

It only seems impossible because you haven’t figured out how to get it done. And you can’t figure that out because you don’t have any time. But you really do, we all have time.

How you spend your time is a reflection of what is important to you. If your goal means something to you or you know you have to get it done you’ll fit it in somewhere.

You can’t get any more time so you have to make do with what you have. So make sure you’re spending it wisely.

5. Everything needs to be perfect

This one could have you waiting forever.

First of all, your idea of perfection is distorted. Secondly, it doesn’t have to be that, whatever that is.

If you wait for A and B to do C you’ll never get to see (C) it. (Get it? I know it was a bad joke but it was right there.) Anyway, waiting for just the right conditions can be costly because you’re wasting precious time.

Things may not be perfect but they’re still manageable. Make the best out of what you have and get started. Many people have made great things from the worst situations and you can too.

6. Overnight success

You’re thinking if it doesn’t happen instantly it’s not going to happen. And you’re dead wrong.

Things take time. It’s all a process.

All the stories you’ve hear and read about overnight successes are excerpts of a much larger tale. They have simply jumped straight to the point without including what happened before it.

You will get there. It just won’t be by tomorrow morning. And that’s ok, it’s realistic.

7. I don’t have enough

You have everything you need you just don’t realize it.

Should you truly need more, like knowledge on a topic or a skill, you can easily obtain it. It’s certainly no reason to give up before you’ve started.

You can figure out anything you need if you open your mind to it. If you’re constantly thinking you’re in a place of lack you cannot work creatively to find a way.

Life is all about learning and you’ll pick up what you need when you need it. Just have faith.

 

When you’re working against yourself it’s impossible to get ahead, especially when the sabotage is from a mental standpoint. But once you let go of these misconceptions it will be easier to breakthrough your plateau.

To be successful you must release the things that are not helping you to achieve more. Hanging on to these vicious thoughts keeps you from trying, from getting anywhere.

Once you realize what little merit these beliefs hold you’ll be on to bigger and better things.

 

And you…

Which vicious belief do you most identify with, which is holding you back? And how can you dispute it?

 

About Lea


Lea is a certified life coach, foodie and lifehack expert. Don’t end up like the millions of people who gave up on their dreams, get unstuck and to the next level. Take the eye-opening Live Your Dreams course now to get moving!


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  • Lea

    Hey Shan,

    Thanks so much!

    Overnight success is a tricky one because it typically comes up later, after some kind of progess as been made.

    ~Lea

  • Wow Lea!

    Sadly, it’s truly amazing “how” many of these seven incredibly vicious and totally destructive beliefs literally got pounded into our heads, by so called well meaning friends,spouses,significant others and or family members etc.

    And you don’t realize and or totally appreciate just how much mental baggage we are constantly carrying around and subconsciously trying to deal with, while pursuing our goals!

    Thanks so much for putting things in crystal perspective for us!

    • Lea

      Hi Mark,

      I know. They seem like helpful words of caution but they act more like road blocks.

      Nope, you have to do some real digging before you get to that level. And typically it comes after a lot of setbacks.

      Thanks for reading and commenting Mark!

      ~Lea

  • Hello Lea, aiming for perfection has been my biggest problem whenever I want to actually finish a project.

    Comparing myself to people who are way more successful is another self-confidence killer, the positive things about this, is that once you have identified what the problems are, you can work on the solutions.

    Another point would be being scared of success (as weird as it sounds) something that has always stopped me in some way.

    But as I said above, I’m currently working a lot on fixing my mindset lately and can’t wait to see what happens in the end.

    Fantastic article Lea, really enjoyed it and couldn’t come at a better timing since I’m actually working on some stuff related to this on this weekend.

    Sergio

    • Lea

      Hi Sergio,

      Exactly, self-awareness is key. You can only fix what you know is broken.

      I know exactly what you mean, and it doesn’t sound weird at all. I’ve actually suffered from that myself. I realized that I wasn’t doing the things I should because I was kind of afraid of succeed, you know like what would happen as a result of it.

      That’s great Sergio! Having the right mindset is the foundation to all success. Wishing you the best of luck!!

      So glad you enjoyed it! Thanks for sharing your experience and plans for change.

      ~Lea

  • The one I most identify with is perfection. I’ll sometimes put things off simply so I can make them better. I realize that it prevents me from doing many things and taking quicker action, but I still tend to do it. Lately, I’ve been trying to get over it by taking immediate action by making quick decisions and sticking to them. That seems to be helping me.

    • Lea

      A lot of people do that Steve, myself included. That’s what makes perfectionsim so counterproductive. I try not to let that stop me anymore, I figure I can always tweak things later.

      That’s good Steve. I hope things continue to improve for you.

      ~Lea

  • Hi Lea

    An eye-opening post indeed.

    Lame excuses are in abundance in this world to avoid attempting and keep doing nothing.

    All the reasons you mentioned not to act and keep sitting doing nothing are very relevant and there is no doubt about it.

    In a bid to reach at the height of perfection in their very first attempt people don’t take their first step and keep standing at a place like being glued to it.

    Thanks a lot for sharing this very powerful post

    • Lea

      Hi Mi,

      Thanks!

      Excuses are used to make people feel good about not doing anything. Once they rational their inaction they become comfortable with it.

      Avoiding doing things prevents direct contact with failure but it also gets you no where.

      You are absolutely right Mi!! Perfection is at it’s worse when it immoblizes you.

      ~Lea

  • Neamat Tawadrous

    Hi Lea,

    Great topic of discussion.

    We all grew up with some vicious beliefs instilled in us and from the way we were brought up. Some of them I just came to realize that I have when I started learning about Personal Development.

    We need to find the roots of our beliefs and work on them. I so much resonate with #5. My husband is very perfectionist and he likes things to be done 1, 2 and 3 not any other way and it has to become perfect. This is contagious that now whatever I do, I seek perfectionism or else I feel inadequate. I know it is a vicious belief but I am working on myself on this but it is hard to change my husband’s belief unless he wants to change it. What I want to say is that we are affected by those around us sometimes.

    Thanks Lea for a great eye-opener post. Enjoy the rest of your week.

    Be Blessed,

    Neamat

    • Lea

      Hi Neamat,

      We have that in common. It wasn’t until I learned about Personal Development that I began to see how I was holding myself back. You tend to think it’s the only way but when you seek improvement your eyes are opened.

      That is very true. You cannot change another person’s views and beliefs until they are ready. They won’t let it in any other way.

      I understand, we are molded and adapt to our environment. So if someone that close to you does something it’s quite easy to pick up their habits, regardless of nature.

      Thank you for your enlightening comment Neamat!! Enjoy the week!

      ~Lea

  • Hi Lea,

    This is one eye opener! We are what we think and if we have a problem … if something is holding us back, we need to face it and fix it.

    I can honestly say I don’t struggle with any of these. I assume it is because I went through them all way back. You see, I’ve been an entrepreneur for most of my life, so when doubt came in, I worked on it. When I felt like things were impossible, I learned how to take the im out and made it possible.

    So yes, I did go through this a long time ago, but whenever I’m in a jam, I know darn well, there is an answer to a problem and If I cannot find it myself, I go out and get it.

    Thanks Lea,

    -Donna

    • Lea

      Hi Donna,

      Thanks! I couldn’t agree with you more. A lot of people like to hide from their problems but that isn’t going to make them go away. You just have to face it head on.

      That’s wonderful! I think there’s even a funny saying explaining that the word impossible itself say’s “I’m possible.” 🙂

      Whenever I doubt things I think about how it can be done. Focusing on that helps you realize that you were wrong and it works out any issues.

      Good for you Donna! Thanks for sharing.

      ~Lea

  • Junie

    This is a fantastic post for reminding us that we are the ones that hold ourselves back. Also, we allow others to hold us back by believing their negative views about us. Sometimes we allow the negative words of others to control us and our future.

    I quite agree that we are a result of our thoughts. That’s why we need to renew our minds with the right (positive) thoughts as much as possible. That’s something I have to work on continually. 🙂

    • Lea

      Hey June,

      I think their negative words are based on their own experiences and fears but that doesn’t define another person’s life. It can seem caucious but it acts as a total derailment.

      I do to June. Whenever I find my mind drifting off into negative I focus on more positive things instead.

      Thanks. Great hearing from you!

      ~Lea

  • Barbara Charles

    Hi Lea,

    Great info. My biggest issue is #5. Got to be perfect and that in itself definitely holds me back. I just discussed with my friend Adrienne that I think what is holding me back from putting out my first product (although it is 98% done) is the fact that I want it to be perfect. Number 7 also comes into play for me then to as well. Guilty as charged. I keep adding just a little of this and a little of that trying to make it perfect. It just never seems to be enough but it’s really ready to go.

    You’ve made me aware even more so today and I was just talking about it so I take this post as a sign. Thank you. 🙂

    Great info to keep us on the right track if we listen. 😉

    Barbara

    • Lea

      Hi Barbara,

      I can definitely see that. I’ve stopped myself dead in my tracks because I keep thinking it’s not done or there is something else I could add to it. Perfectionism is tough cause the seems like there is good intention but it really just holds you back.

      Glad I could help 🙂 Best of luck!!

      Thanks for sharing Barbara.

      ~Lea

  • Great post. My biggest challenge is being too much of a perfectionist. I have to tweak and tweak! Luckily I don’t have too much problem with bouncing back after failures – I’m far too stubborn. I just dust myself down and bounce right back again!

    • Lea

      Sometimes you just have to remind yourself that things are good as they are.

      Wow Joy, that’s awesome. Failure usually prevents a lot of people from being able to move forward easily. It’s great that you’re so resilient.

      ~Lea

  • Fantastic post. Yes I agree with all the points that you’ve mentioned. People often afraid to take risks because they think if they do it once and can’t get effective result or fail to achieve their result. But, the thing is if you never fail you’ll never learn. In other words, Failure makes you better to get effective result.

    • Lea

      Righty-o my friend!

      It’s all a learning process. You try something out if it doesn’t work, try another way. Like the old saying goes, there’s more than one way to skin a cat.

      Failure is funny like that. It’s a setback but you still gain something useful out of it.

      ~Lea

  • Hi Lea

    Your post is awesome. Seems to me that there are members of ABC that are of the same mind.

    First I agree that the things that do give us success can also lead us to failure which is why our choices do make or break us.

    I love the 7 beliefs that keep one off from the road of success as they are true and do affect us negatively if we allow them to do such. Looking at them, they are just plain excuses that deceive our minds.

    • Lea

      Hi Ikechi,

      Thanks.

      They sure are. These vicious beliefs seem valid at a glad but if you really look at them you’ll realize how they are pushing you backward.

      A lot of them can be based on fears. If something scares you that much it’s worth looking into.

      ~Lea

  • Love this Lea!
    And yes, what somebody else is thinking, living or not living, is not our business… That is not meant to sound harsh, but it is what has helped me release a lot of my beliefs. Yes, what is true for you may well be true for you, but this does not mean it has to be true for me. In the beginning, I tried to convince others, explain myself, etc… but since I gave that up as well, all is going so much easier 😉

    For a while, even though I had these insights about how you create your own reality, even though I really knew this to be true, the need to get agreement from others was holding me back. But now I just say, yes you are right. If someone is fearful, not believing then that is totally fine and none of my business. But it has nothing to do with me…

    Great post! Loved it!

    Live, Love, Enjoy!
    Linda

    • Lea

      Glad you do Linda! 🙂

      I couldn’t agree more. We all have different views, I think that’s what makes us great. We’re not copies of another. We all can have very different beliefs and views and still be equally happy. It’s a wonderful thing.

      It really is easier. Realizing that you don’t need other’s approval releases a lot of stress.

      Yup, that’s their problem, don’t make it yours. Completely separate…

      Thanks Linda. So glad you enjoyed it!

      ~Lea

  • Hi Lea,
    One word: Awesome
    two words: awesomely inspirational
    Many words:
    Yeah Lea, I love your way of being hindered in the road to success and how to cross it. It is true, if you wait for someone else’s approval,you definitely are going to lose your calm and your ruling self. You cannot live your life.
    I can’t do anything is like criticizing yourself and insulting God who has given some good in everyone.
    Wonderful write up. Keep it up 🙂

    • Lea

      Hi Swadhin,

      Thanks so much!

      Good point. Everyone has their own special gifts and talents its just a matter of finding out what they are. And accepting that they may not be what you expected, but it can still be a great skill to have.

      Thanks for the feedback.

      ~Lea

  • Whoah I like this. It’s why I really need a mastermind group. There are a lot of people that think like this around me and no matter what I do, eventually, it will affect me. It takes a toll mentally. 🙂

    Great topic Lea!

    • Lea

      Thanks Dennis!

      When you’re surrounded by people like this it can definitely impact you in a negative way. You can fight it and be successful but it’s going to take a look of work, especially in the beginning, on your end.

      Best of luck. Hope you can overcome it!

      ~Lea

  • Hi Lea,

    Good topic for discussion!
    I agree with all of these. Failure is not the end of everything. It is a lesson for us to be better. I’ve heard a wise advice “This is just a bad day, not a bad life” It is a good word to motivate.

    Indeed, success is not an overnight job. There are many processes that must go through. All the processes that make us better over time. It is a life lesson, I guess! 🙂

    Thanks for sharing, Lea.
    It’s great post!

    ~Nanda

    • Lea

      Hi Nanda,

      Thanks!

      Great quote, thanks for sharing that! It’s true. One hiccup doesn’t define the it all.

      Yes! I guess you could look at like one thing rolls into the other. The failures are part of the process that helps you learn and in time you’ll have that success.

      Thanks for commenting Nanda!

      ~Lea

  • Great points, Lea. You look at things in a minute manner. I loved the way you presented the post in a simple but effective manner.
    I loved your someone else’s approval. Earlier, I also used to seek approval from people on different things. I was always dependent on somebody to give a nod.

    I think I have to solve my perfectionist problem because sometimes I feel like overdoing things and due to this I lose the real meaning behind the work. Thanks for this lovely reminder
    Have a great week ahead

    • Lea

      Thanks Yatin. I always want to make sure that its helpful to others.

      I don’t think you were the only one. Many people base their life decisions on other people’s thoughts.

      But you’re life should be your own, and a sum of your desires.

      I kind of have the same issue every now and then. But my perfectionism issues cause me to stall. Sometimes waiting for something that isn’t necessary or re-doing.

      When you catch yourself doing that try to reconnect with the meaning of it all. That should help you figure out what is right and enough.

      Enjoy your weekend.

      ~Lea

  • Hi, Lea,

    Loved your first sentence, so powerful!

    These are vicious beliefs indeed! It reminded me of the book: The Power of Story: Change Your Story, Change Your Destiny in Business and in Life by Jim Loehr. What a phenomenal book!

    Anyway, I am glad you’re putting attention on this very important subject because I see a need more than ever before.

    Your #2 really resonated with me because I’ve learned in the school of hard knocks that failure is just the beginning. We truly do fail forward to success. I learned this way back when I was a Mary Kay consultant.

    My perfectionist tendencies have gotten me into trouble more than once, I can assure you. 🙂

    Awesome post, Lea, and I will be sharing.

    Take Care,

    – Carol 🙂

    • Lea

      Hey Carol,

      Thanks Carol. I think that the way you think about something is the foundation of it all. It basically sets the tone. So if you think something isn’t going to work out, things tend to fall into place like that.

      So you need to get over that before you can make progress.

      “Fail forward to success.” I like that.

      Yes, it’s all just lessons learned. Not the end, but a new, more educated beginning.

      Thanks, I appreciate it! 🙂

      ~Lea

  • Hi Lea
    Great post and you make some excellent points and give some great examples of beliefs that need to be shifted. The part about asking where a belief came from is particularly important when trying to make shifts, and change our mindset.

    So much of what we believe never really came from us, but over time we bought into it, and that was mirrored back to us in our experiences. Always consider the source..look at the people whom you admire, and learn a bit more about what they believe. Try those on for size, and see what happens. Don’t listen to people who are unhappy and unsuccessful.

    • Lea

      Hey Kelli,

      I’m glad you agree. Knowing where something came from can help you shift your thoughts about it. Sometimes you may even find that the belief was illogical.

      Exactly! People who are unhappy and unsuccessful shouldn’t be choice models. You should always look for inspiration and guidance from those who are on the path closest to what you desire. Only their words and actions will be most helpful.

      ~Lea